how about we just pretend we were never friends?

Have you ever run into someone from your past and pretended not to know them? That happened to me this week while on the Metro. One morning, I was fortunate enough to get stuck on an Orange Line train that held at each station in Arlington for at least 2 minutes. While at Clarendon, J.W. came on my train car.

J.W. (name withheld to protect the jerk) and I became friends while in the same prerequisite public health class at GW. He had just moved here and didn't really know anyone. At the time, I had been in DC for a few months and totally understood where he was coming from. We became friends, drinking partners, and study buddies. J.W. seemed to have a lot of drama going on in his life for a boy--life aspirations, cancer, and a very needy girlfriend. They were doing the whole long distance thing, which was not good for her high-maintenance self.

Night after night (and day after day for that matter), I listened to J.W.'s problems. Often, I offered advice but most of the time, I just listened. I got the sense that J.W. didn't really have THAT kind of friend in his life--someone who would listen and not judge and just be there. I lost a lot of sleep just "being there" for him.

One day, I became the friend with the drama. It was right around the time of my birthday and I had the biggest family drama going on. It was also midterm time, which came with it's own stress-inducing abilities. I needed a friend. Badly. So, I turned to J.W. Suddenly, J.W. didn't have the time to deal with me. And he was definitely too busy to just listen. And during this incredibly stressful time in my life, I realized who my real friends were...and J.W. wasn't one of them. When he finally decided he had time to be my friend, it was a week later and other friends had helped me through the drama. I told him to take his "friendship" and stick it up where the sun don't shine. I rid myself of his toxicity.

So, two years later, we met again on the Metro. He got on and I immediately turned my back. I could see out of the corner of my eye that he had seen me. Moments later, I was brave enough to turn around. After all, I had matured some since then. Perhaps we could be civil with one another. Or not. He avoided my gaze. At Foggy Bottom, I passed by him on my way out of the train car, with my head held high.

I sincerely hope he's doing well (see? I have grown up!). And I really hope that he treats his friends the same way that they treat him.