i will forever be known as the girl who killed the rally

Jesse and I played kickball again last night (“the couple who plays together stays together”…or something like that). We were very proud of our win last week and felt pretty good about playing a team that had previous lost by a lot of runs. I wouldn’t say that we were over-confident…just confident enough to win.

So, it felt odd to us when we were being shut out up until the last inning. How is it that shut outs happen? It’s kickball, after all. The game is based on offensive production. It’s really about who can score the most points by the end of the game…not about who’s defense is good enough to keep the other team from scoring. That’s just crazy.

But then a miracle happened. In the bottom of the 5th, we rallied. After being down 3-0, we quickly (although getting to this point felt like an eternity) came back and pulled within one. At this point, there were runners on second base and first. And then the words I was hoping not to hear with two outs in the bottom of the 5th—“Liz, you’re up.”

It was all so surreal. This feeling of dread came over me as I made my way to home plate. Walking past my teammates, I could hear them say, “Go Liz!” “You can do it.” Eye of the Tiger starts playing in my head. Full of an impending sense of doom, I came up to the plate and saw the ball come towards me. It was way off to the left of the plate. Ball 1. One of my teammates yells, “Good eye, Liz!” The ball comes at me again. With the hopes and dreams of all my teammates, I give it a good kick. Foul Ball. The ball comes at me a third time. With my own hope and dream of becoming the game’s hero, I kick it with power. Foul Ball again. “Come on, Liz.” That’s right. Come on, Liz. You CAN do this. You CAN win the game for your team. For the fourth time, the ball comes. It took a strange bounce but I kicked it anyways…with all of my might.

Oh I kicked it alright. Straight into the pitcher’s hands. He then proceeds to tag me out as I race to first base. The rally ends, but even worse, the game ends too.

Damn it. I let the team down. I let myself down too.