the worst birthday ever

My birthday is two weeks from tomorrow. I’m kinda stressed about it. Honestly, I’m not really worried about getting older. I’m turning 28. When I turned 27, I had begun to accept that the big three-oh was not only imminent but also unavoidable. I’ve had a whole year to come to terms with that. I’m worried because this year presents another opportunity to forget the horrible birthday that was my 25th…and I want my 28th to be perfect.

Shortly before my 25th birthday, my brother proposed to a woman I had never met. In fact, no one in my family had met her. Moreover, he had just broken up with his girlfriend of 7 years during that summer. Why is it that he proposed to someone after dating her for a short while when he never popped the question to his girlfriend of forever? Needless to say, my family was not happy. In addition to that, they set a wedding date for November, making their engagement last all of one month. I was confused. It all seemed so rash. My family was coming to me, hoping that I could fix things. After all, I was the closest to my brother. They wanted me to talk some sense into him. Oh…and did I mention that I was going through midterms while this was happening?

The night before a major paper was due (and two days before my birthday) my mom and sister had a breakdown about my brother’s impending marriage. They asked me to intervene so maybe he could help them understand why he was being so hasty. I was on the phone for hours that night, back and forth between my brother and my sister. I could hear my mom crying in the background. It was horrible.

My brother sounded so much in love. He spoke of his future wife with so much emotion. I knew this was different from the ex. I finally asked him, “Are you sure that this is what you wanna do? Do you really need to rush into marriage?” His reply: “I love her. I don’t want to wait.” I explained to my mom and sister that we needed to respect his decision, even if we didn’t agree with it. He really did love her and she seemed to make my brother happy. For my brother’s sake, we should drop the drama. Eventually, my mom and sis listened.

I had tried so hard to be strong for my family. I really needed someone to lean on then and I turned to my “friend” J.W. who ended up not being there for me. I withdrew and decided to hold it all inside. By the time my birthday came around, I had no plans. When my friend Roo Roos found out, he and his partner at the time decided to take me out so I wouldn’t be alone.

They took me out to my favorite restaurant in the city at the time. I tried to enjoy myself but it was hard. I was stressed out and my heart felt so heavy all the time. I just wanted my birthday to be over with. I appreciate that Roo Roos kept me from being alone that night. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough to get over the crap.

My quest to forget my 25th birthday began with my 26th. I refuse to have a miserable birthday again. My 26th was awesome. Shell flew out for the occasion. I had dinner at ESPN Zone with my friends during the baseball playoffs. It was awesome. For my 27th, we all went out to Lauriol Plaza for dinner, followed by drinks in Adams Morgan. I just had to see Ted (my bartender) at Millie and Al’s for a birthday drink. Everyone had a great time that night. I was pretty stoked. The following weekend, Jesse and I went to Cali to celebrate my b-day with my family. My 27th was probably the best birthday ever.

With my 28th approaching, I am stressed about making the perfect plans. It’s a good kind of stress though. As long as my 28th is better than my 25th, I think I'll be ok.