metro bus driver impropriety: an update

Two days ago I told you the story about the Metro bus driver who hit on me and gave me his number. The shock and awe he caused with this gesture kept me from being completely honest with the inappropriate bus driver and telling him about Jesse. In my state of surprise, I took his number and hastily walked away. I asked quite a few people for advice on what to do next. After all, I am clearly not interested but he is my bus driver so I have to see him almost every day. A number of you loyal blog peeps weighed in with your advice, as well as a few others that fall under the non-blog-reading category. Here is a brief summary:

Golden Silence opined, “I think you should've been honest with him” and she hoped that maybe the driver should just “do his daggone job!” Here, here.

Beakerz suggested, “Take the compliment and worry about the rest later” and that the return of Flirty Girl would hopefully take the attention off of me.

Sunchaser agreed with Golden Silence and added, “He might or might not believe you, but it's always better to be honest, IMHO.”

A male co-worker of mine weighed in with, “Is he cute? Let me have his number!”

As far as what Jesse thinks…well he’s not happy but he didn’t suggest that I never take the bus again, which would be difficult. He did offer to take the bus with me (which would take him no where near Loudon County where he works but the thought was sweet).

To be honest with you, I know that being truthful about my situation (having a very loving, almost perfect boyfriend that I’ve been happy with for almost 3 years) was the right way to go. But I feared exactly what Beakerz thought might happen if I went the truthful route since I wasn’t up-front to begin with: “You didn't say, "sorry, i have a boyfriend" so now it's kinda like a blow-off line if you say it, even if true.” So when it comes down to it, I feared the bus driver might think that I’m a liar. And I would hate for anyone to think that of me, especially someone who has the power to control my commute to work if angry (heaven forbid he might use the rejection against me).

I caught a lucky break yesterday as I waited for the bus. There was an unusual amount of traffic and the bus was late (the lateness is not unusual). I saw the ART bus approach (the Arlington public transit for those of you who aren’t Arlingtonians) with the Metro bus following a short distance behind. I could either get on the ART bus and avoid the Metro bus driver or I could take the Metro bus and have a little chat with him to set things straight. I chickened out and opted to take the ART bus.

Today, however, was a different story. After stressing out over what should be a relatively simple thing to do, I decided not to give Metro bus driver that much power over me and the relative stability of my life. As I was getting ready for work, I was determined to reject the bus driver TODAY. I wore the Tiffany ring and Tiffany necklace Jesse gave me to inspire me to overcome my anxiety about it all and went out to the bus stop.

The bus was late yet again today (this is exactly what I get for jinxing myself by saying that it had been relatively reliable lately). Eventually, I saw a Metro bus in the distance and I immediately became nervous. However, I instantly recognized the silliness of it all. I’m the one rejecting him. Why should I be nervous? I got on the bus and said my usual good morning to the bus driver as I swiped my SmarTrip card. I took a seat and opened up my book and waited until we got to the Metro station.

At the Metro station (which is the end of the line), I waited for most people to get off of the bus. As I waited, a female rider approached him. She was tall and skinny and looked nothing like me (like Flirty Girl). The bus driver told her, “Hey, girl, what’s up?” The girl said, “So you haven’t called me.” The bus driver said very nonchalantly, “Yeah, I’ve been busy.” Clearly not taking the hint, the girl said, “Ok, well, I’ll be waiting to hear from you then.” I rolled my eyes.

I realized two things right then. One, the bus driver is using his bus route as a dating service. And two, clearly this was an act of God. Because when I heard Call Me Girl’s little convo with the bus driver, the anxiety went away. At this point, rejecting him was no big deal to me.

After giving the bus driver what I assume she thinks is a sexy smile, Call Me Girl left. Then it was my turn. I walked up to the bus driver and said, “Hey, do you have a second?” He got up out of his seat and stood a little too close to me and said “Sure, what’s up?” Resisting the desire to take two steps away from him, I said, “So the other day you really took me by surprise. After all, we’ve never even talked before and then all of a sudden you’re giving me your number. It was very surprising.” He responded with a smug laugh, “Heh, heh.”

I continued slowly so as not to appear nervous, “Well, I should’ve told you this the other day but I was too surprised to tell you at the time that I have a boyfriend. We’ve been together for a long time and we even live together. I’m sorry but I’m not available.” The bus driver looked surprised but he calmly said, “Oh, ok, that’s cool.” And because I would hate for him to drive the bus past me one day, thereby making me late to work, I added, “But we’re cool though, right?” The bus driver chuckled and said, “Yeah, yeah, we’re cool. You have a nice day then and I’ll see you again soon.” I answered, “Yeah, dude, you too.”

Whew. Crisis over.

Hands down, that was the best rejection ever.