the golden rule: live it, love it
Last night, my sister and I were g-chatting and she was telling me about some horrific dates she's been on lately. Actually, one of the dates was a good one, but then the guy decided to go back to his ex. I cannot attest to the validity of his story, but my sister seemed to buy it. Why he was on an internet dating website when he was in talks of going back to the ex is beyond me though.
She went on this one date with this guy who seemed pretty good on paper. And then she met him. Although he had gone through extensive schooling and even taught at a local university, he sounded ghetto. Apparently, he thought that speaking like a young man from 'da hood' is the way an associate professor should speak. However, my sister, who is no stranger to extensive schooling herself, was incredibly turned off.
And rightfully so. My sister teaches at an elementary school in the ghetto of Orange County (yes, the OC has a ghetto). Her students speak the way this adult educator was speaking. There's something wrong with this picture.
Unfortunately for my sis, Ghetto Boy took a strong liking to her. After the date, he called and texted and emailed incessantly. My sister, who clearly didn't want to see him again and was disgusted when he tried to kiss her at the end of the date, has been avoiding him like the plague. Yet, Ghetto Boy can't take a hint.
So I advised her to tell him. She needs to tell him that she's sorry but unfortunately, she didn't feel anything but friend-type feelings and she's not interested in him in a romantic way.
My sis replied: "Really? You think"
Ummm, yes. Do onto others, dude. If my sister had been the one in Ghetto Boy's shoes, she wouldn't appreciate being left hanging. Yeah, I know it's hard to reject someone. But it's the right thing to do.
Hopefully, letting him down gently will reduce the multi-forms of communication harassment. If not, a restraining order should work nicely.
5 comments:
Dating just sucks! I feel your sisters pain - I really do!
It's interesting that she was put off by his style of speaking. Huh.
CH 20210: yeah, man. maybe when my sis is in town, you guys could vent about dating over drinks.
LET: under no circumstances should an educated man speak all "ghetto", especially as a professor.
funny you mention that, tho. she feels guilty b/c she thinks she's being too picky. i think she has standards and shouldn't settle.
No guilt, no recriminations. Those that know or ought to know better should be held to a higher standard.
Full Disclosure: I once stopped dating a woman because she used the "word" "conversate" without irony.
That was good advice, and I hope she followed through. And he could speak like a bard, but if she didn't like him then that's all there is to it.
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